“Mommy, I need something.”
“What do you need?”
“I don’t know.”
This conversation happens on a regular basis between me and my oldest daughter, three-year-old Ella.
Why do our kids always “need something”? Haven’t they figured out that Mommy and Daddy have a million things on their to-do lists and that if those things don’t get done, they’ll just get piled onto tomorrow’s to-do list?
Some days, the “I needs” come so hard and fast that my head is just spinning and all I can think about is collapsing onto the couch and just giving up.
Other days, the girls are just being so sweet and adorable, I get all sorts of warm fuzzies just watching them play and before I know it, the day is over and that darn laundry is still sitting on the floor where I left it last morning.
There has to be a way to do both. I want to soak in those precious moments with my little girls while keeping the house from falling apart around me.
Some people say, “The days when your kids are young are the best! Spend every minute with them before they grow older and leave the house forever!”
Those people have forgotten what these days are really like.
Sure I could spend all day with my eyes glued to my kids like they are the most fascinating creatures on the planet, but then the bills wouldn’t get paid, food wouldn’t get made, and who knows what kind of hazardous mold would be growing in the bathtub right now!
There has to be a way to do both: spend quality time with our kids and get work done.
Looking for an organized guide of fun, easy activities to do with your toddler that also encourages their growth and development?
I’ve created a 3-month activity planner just for busy parents like you! The plan includes 65 detailed, simple, and stress-free activities including: arts and crafts, sensory play, motor skills, and STEM–all using easy-to-find supplies.
Let me help make planning activities for your toddler easy, so you can skip the stress and get straight to the fun!
How to Make Playtime Do Work for You
Having one baby is a huge lifestyle change. Having a second baby is just as huge of an adjustment.
I’ve been there! The first time you’re home alone with not one, but TWO tiny humans is kind of terrifying.
Suddenly, there’s twice the bodies that need you, there’s twice the voices calling out for help, and there’s twice as many kids that need constant supervision and attention. Raising kids always requires more time than we think.
How does anyone get anything done when they have small kids?
It does get better after the newborn phase. My nine-month-old only nurses four times a day now instead of every 2-3 hours, and she can play with her big sister for the most part. So that’s a huge thing to look forward to if you are struggling with the newborn phase. It gets better! Just hang in there for another month!
So now maybe you’re at that point where you can keep everyone alive, but that’s about all you feel like you’re accomplishing each day.
If that’s you, maybe it’s time now for you to make playtime do work for you.
What I mean by that is to use playtime to focus on giving your kids all the parental attention they need, making all the memories that need to be made so that you can look back on this period of your life and go, “Aww, I was such a great parent,” while still getting stuff done.
There are three things you can do to maximize playtime with your kids so that you can get to your to-do list before the day is over.
- Fill your kids’ love tank
- Teach your kids how to play
- Have regularly scheduled activities
I’ll go over each in more detail.
Looking for an organized guide of fun, easy activities to do with your toddler that also encourages their growth and development?
I’ve created a 3-month activity planner just for busy parents like you! The plan includes 65 detailed, simple, and stress-free activities including: arts and crafts, sensory play, motor skills, and STEM–all using easy-to-find supplies.
Let me help make planning activities for your toddler easy, so you can skip the stress and get straight to the fun!
Fill Your Kids’ Love Tank
When are your kids particularly disobedient or whiny?
For us, we discovered that our oldest misbehaves most when we haven’t given her enough of our attention. (You can read more about that here.)
So the first step to a more productive day with kids is to spend time with them. It’s counterintuitive, but it works.
We need to fill up our kids’ love tanks by setting aside a block of time (a half hour, an hour, it’s up to you!) to really listen, engage, and have conversations with them.
Treat this special time like an important appointment. Silence your phone. Turn off the TV.
Do something together that will let your child know that you love him and love being with him.
Special time with your kids lets them know that they’re loved and ensures that they get that extra attention that they need, especially when they’re young and/or have siblings.
Teach Your Kids How to Play
Seriously? Teach your kids how to play? I thought this was like the one thing they were born knowing how to do.
Yes and no.
Kids know how to play. But being able to play independently is a learned skill. One that definitely needs teaching and practice.
And it requires a little tough love.
Let’s agree that mommies and daddies cannot spend every waking hour attending to their children.
Supervise, yes. Wait on, no.
I started independent play times with my daughter when she was about 14 months old. I just sat her down inside a circle of toys and told her I was going across the room and she would play by herself for a few minutes.
What logically followed was chaos, obviously. But only for a short time.
Once she saw that I was not going anywhere and understood that I wasn’t going to play with her, she calmed down and played. Didn’t last long, but that was OK. We tried.
As you gradually increase the amount of time you leave your kids alone to play, they’ll start to get the hang of it and initiate independent play time on their own.
When this happens, give yourself a pat on the back. You’re parenting on a whole different playing field now. One where you get a block of 15 minutes or more all. to. yourself.
Go ahead. Have that extra cup of coffee. You’ve earned it.
**It’s important to note that being able to play independently only happens once kids’ love tanks have been filled. So give them your undivided attention first, and then segue into independent play time.
Bonus tip: Open-ended toys are killer for independent play! Just be sure to have toys that are on target for your kids’ age and development.
Have Regularly Scheduled Activities that Kids Love
What kinds of activities do your kids love? Running around outside? Getting their hands messy in some slime?
Pick one or two of these activity genres that your kids absolutely love and schedule times where they can do these activities every day.
Having a specific activity genre to do saves both time and money.
- less time finding an activity that the kids will like
- less money on supplies
Having regularly scheduled activities like the ones in our Activity Playbook gives kids something to look forward to each day and gives you a second to catch your breath or tackle an item on the to-do list.
Not sure how to get started? In this post of indoor kids’ activities, we break up all our indoor activities by genre and list a bunch of activities for you to try with your kids.
The Next Step
So the real key to getting stuff done when you have little kids is to make sure you’re filling your kids’ love tank and meeting their need for attention, teaching them how to play independently, and having fun activities scheduled in your day.
Try it out. Make sure to fill kids’ love tanks first before you try anything crazy like independent playtime. You’ll notice a better disposition in your toddler and a greater willingness to play alone.
Looking for an organized guide of fun, easy activities to do with your toddler that also encourages their growth and development?
I’ve created a 3-month activity planner just for busy parents like you! The plan includes 65 detailed, simple, and stress-free activities including: arts and crafts, sensory play, motor skills, and STEM–all using easy-to-find supplies.
Let me help make planning activities for your toddler easy, so you can skip the stress and get straight to the fun!